Me exes mother used to do that.
Mind you all the casual racism and "take me as you find me" "and I tell it like is" narrative that somehow gives license to elite level cuntitude in spouting unsolicited Ill informed opinionated random diatribes and being an utterly abhorrent person in pretty much every way kind of rendered that a bit insignificant.
"Did an Ingo". Probably.
That would imply it was my worst shitting incident.
I want sushi for dinner but the good sushi place doesn't do delivery, so I'd have to put outside clothes on to go and get it.
Might just order pizza.
I’m on call this weekend. Which is a bit shite as we don’t get paid a retainer, just overtime if the phone rings and then more if we have to go in.
At midnight it switches to someone else.
I’d quite like a drink, but can’t. That said fuck it, I’m having an Old Fashioned and if the phone rings I’ll ignore it or fob it off. If they want me to treat it seriously they can pay me for not drinking all weekend.
This is a belting Old Fashioned
I thought you were back in the painting and decorating game these days?
Is it likely someone needs and emergency ceiling skim or wallpapering in the drawing room that can't wait until morning?
Women can get a bit mental about decorating.
I'm getting married in the morning. Which is nice.
So naturally I'm sitting in a hotel suite posting to a bunch of imaginary webmongs on the interspaz. Stunning Cathedral backdrop and the bells are a-chiming. Loudly as they're just across the way.
I mean, it's not for us or anything obviously. Must be practice night or something but it's all rather splendid.
Congratulations. Get an early night, pot noodle maybe, you'll need the energy in the morning.
You should have a good wank as practice for the death of your sex life.
If he's near a cathedral, and they are practising making noise, he can probably get a spare choir boy to do it for him. The priests have normally already trained them up.
Trying to decide if I can be bothered to go out for a pint. On the one hand, it won't just be one and I have to be up early tomorrow for golf. On the other hand, I really fancy a pint.
Married.
How was the Pot Noodle?
I've heard of a shotgun wedding but not a breakfast wedding.
Presumably the evening do starts at noon?
