I had no alcohol January and February. Felt good. Started March thinking booze just on weekends. Made me feel crap.
Therefore finishing March by getting through six bottles of wine in 4 days. Which is quite a low rate of consumption when compared to historical trends. Going to try beer again.
When we moved into our new place the garden was an absolute shit-hole. Nobody had touched it for 20 years. Totally overgrown. Rubble. Bare earth. Just a mess. Got a mate of a mate who is a gardener to sort it all out last week. Lawn, patio, path, borders etc. Cost about £5K (considerably cheaper than many of the quotes we had). Done a great job. But woke up this morning to find that a fox has pulled up about 40% of the new turf. Fucking fuming. Now researching what to do. Don't think it's died yet but if it keeps happening it will do. Thinking maybe to peg the turf down with camping pegs and put some chicken wire over the top.
Shades: Has land, forgot gun.
Shoot the fox is surely the obvious answer here.
Or if you want to go for the lesbo option foxes shit the bed at random noises, have you got any kids toys that make sounds you can put out on the garden at night until the roots take?
I'm thinking to pin one of these over it for the next month or two:
www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B09DBTP2N5?ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_fed_asin_title&th=1
Though the fox may dig through it.
Dragged my sorry hungover ass down to the clinic for a blood donation appointment only to be told that I'm not eligible as I've been in Asia within the last month. Feel like they could have mentioned that in the questionnaire they make you fill in online before you go rather than making me change out of my pyjamas and go all the way down there.
“Sorry mate, but we can’t rule out you catching AIDS from bumming a ladyboy.”
MS Paint?
By gawd it's been a while.
You would have thought that someone would have introduced him to the gimp by now?.....[insert own joke here]
The thick twat sat behind me who spent the whole period after Murillo and CHO went off grumbling about why Pereira didn’t make more changes to “freshen things up “.
He had already freshened things up by swapping a winger for a centre half, and leaving on the injured players, and the ones cramping.
Can you imagine the noise if the ginger wizard had done that, and presided over that performance?
An own goal and deflection, 3 half's getting battered, 1 of them against 10 men, too much running in training, something something something, boo to nostalgia, the man is a brontosaurus, miners welfare comedian, mathematically certain we'll get done at Villa Park.
Met the most sensational girl last night. Polish. Blonde. Tattooed. Looks like prime Brigitte Nielsen. Was very into me.
Sadly I was so drunk she had to hold me up as we walked back from the bar. Epic fail.
Are you sure it wasn't a bloke?
Chicago: Still recovering from Baby Reindeer.
