What's annoying me today

Helped Little Miss Shady with some reading tonight. Seems I'm at fault for capitalism. Who knew.

So to summarise: time spent raising your children is time not spent fixing the world they're going to inherit, and time spent proudly marching with them to show off their homemade festive hats is time not spent marching with them to smash the capitalist machine and seize the means of production.

You monster

Hey Dougie is on!

Fuck the Mets! The Rain did you a favour.

Chicago: Cubs Fan.

April Fool's Day. 98% of "pranks" are lame corporate attempts hatched by marketing committees to make their brand seem fun.

Jeremy Vine did one on Twitter about him using his drone to record himself cycling round Hyde Park and it getting attacked by a bird or prey.

Problem is he's such a dick everyone believes he would have his drone following him

He's posted it was a joke etc but so far he's been reported to the Met, The Royal Parks police and the RSPB/RSPCA.

My old theatre announced on FB that to ease post-show congestion at the exit doors they were attaching slides to all windows and even did an artist's impression of what it would look like.
I expect it amused somebody.

Shorts. When I lived in Thailand, shorts, as standard, were knee length. Here, wtf is wrong with you people? Half of men's shorts are showing off half your arse cheeks. The other half are still showing far too much thigh. And why are they all so bloody colourful? Or alternatively brown with pockets for your tools? Why?

I just want a pair of cotton trousers, neutral in colour, that come down to my knee. One pair found so far in a year, from bloody Peacocks. Yes, they're shit, but not as shit as everything else.

Stop skipping leg day, Higgins.

Would have thought there was lots of blokes running around Thailand in short shorts, to be fair.

Who likes short shorts?

Partridge

Is this the start of another day in Tricky's life picture series?

Today's theme - mens arses