The Mundane medical thread

Goats are just posh sheep. Don't scrap the barrel if you are going to catch a disease with some animal fun do it right. Jesus..

The sciatica it seems to have been caused by a combination of being assaulted by ice and a divvy electric scooter and the wife's new mega expensive mattress. (As in I paid for the fucker...). It was incredibly icy a few weeks ago and having a manual gearbox allows you to drive much more easiliy than most of the areas drivers. So having navigated black ice first thing in the morning from the night's ice storm I go to park near my work. Someone in a pique of mardyiness abandoned their electric scooter in the street where I wanted to park. I got out of the car and went to pick it up and move it not realising that they are actually way heavier than they look and slipped backwards on the ice at the same time. Falling I threw the scooter as far as could and it went all of 6 inches and landed on my arm and I crashed awkwardedly on the road. I think the neighbourhood thought there was a coyote loose (and yes there are wild ones in Chicago) as I howled in pain and turned into Quasimodo. As in I couldn't use my right arm all day because it was bruised as fuck. "The Bells!!!!".

Anyway, i made it through the work day with a gammy arm and a sore back and went home late at night. Wifey made me buy this new mattress for the house (I was perfectly happy with the one we had) for an insane amount of money. I cannot remember if it was $3500 or $5000. It's soft. With a slightly twisted pelvis, sleeping on that thing is a very bad idea. Since then I have been waking up in pain shooting down my leg. It has been gruesome. It was so bad I was forced to try find an alternative place to sleep and found that the futon was much harder and better. I am muddling through but for the first time in 28 years of marriage we are sleeping apart under the same roof. I think this is a bad idea. I have asked to change the mattress and she is fighting me. This is not going to end well.

The chiropractor is out of the country and I my neuromuscular therapy is a drunk and hardly available. The only thing I can do is work (as walking isn't terrible), and finding a way to sleep like Bela Lagosi if I am to share a bed again..

Bollocks.

Chicago: All twisted up.

Mrs Chic: "I've finally got him and that fucking apnea machine out of the bedroom."

Oh you just don't understand sexy!

Chicago: Darth Vader vibes.

Been wiped out by the flu for the last week.

The only plus has been I’ve barely being eating so have lost 6kg, which won’t do any harm.

Back pain so bad when i am trying to sleep I am going for a full body scan. The goal is to get the spine and the knee in one go. Chances are i will be diagnosed with cancer instead.

This really isn't any more fun than trying to get an authenticator that works with Trentend and apple.

Chicago: Broken.

My right hand, specifically my little finger and that side of my hand, keeps going numb. I thought I must have been sleeping funny so I changed my pillows which seemed to help, but it's started happening through the day now as well. I should probably go see the doctor about it.

I'm guessing it's probably some kind of weird nerve thing that will get better all on its own, but I'm also not ruling out the onset of a serious life changing illness. Likely best to find out.

It’s probably a pinched nerve in your neck. I am sure you are fine. Usually affects side sleepers.

Although numbness on the left could indicate you are about to have a massive heart attack which is probably unlikely without the impending doom feelings and the shortness of breath.

Quite certain you are going to outlive me.

Chicago: At death’s door.

I am indeed a side sleeper. Left side seems to be fine and last check up a couple of months ago indicated that blood pressure, cholesterol and all the other shit that goes to heart health was in good nick.

Middle aged man, single, right hand keeps going numb. OK.

After 20 years, I'm guessing you've developed an alternative technique.

I had similar a few years ago. Ended in crippling pain that needed chiropractic to resolve. Trapped nerve between my shoulder blades. Excercise and some pilates worked well for me. Am element of it is age though. Dehydrating disks. This helped complete-pilates.co.uk/thread-the-needle/

Mmm. My general fitness is very good, but lifting a lot and occasionally running are not conducive at all to mobility. I should probably introduce some proper stretching to my routine, perhaps I'll look for a regular yoga class.